This article is taken from my recently published book Earth Wisdom http://www.wholelifegym.com/spiritual_books.htm

1. Do not act in order to receive a payoff.

This is what is causing much of our discomfort as individuals and a society. As soon as you act with the purpose of receiving something, you have removed love from the act. The goal is to act as if all your needs are met, then all your thinking and behavior comes from a different perspective. You also find that you act more effectively to get those things that you truly want, because you are acting and thinking as if you already have them. The alternative is acting and thinking as if you don't, and guess what, you don't. The state of mind of having something creates it, not the other way around.

The place you see this most is in relationships. The more you need in relationships, the less you get. This is simply because you are saying that you are not whole until someone else meets those needs that can never be met. Often what happens is that you eventually get the opposite because you are trying to show yourself that you must look inside. Once again, in relationships you must look to be loving, respectful, and accepting, because this is saying that you have all these things to give. In the end these things will be overflowing from you. Remember if you want to have something, give it, because you must have it if you can give it.

Abundance is another area this concept plays a major role. The more you say you need and operate from a place of not having enough, the more that state of mind will be created physically. This is why the very wealthy can sometimes feel impoverished, and the very poor can sometimes feel wealthy. Remember that perception is everything and that your thinking, feelings, and actions come from those perceptions.

2. You are the only judge of your life and what you will judge in the last moment of your life, is how well you loved.

Believe it or not, you do not really care what you accomplish in your life. How much you acquire, and how successful you are will not mean a thing when you decide to leave your body. Imagine that you are all living your own movie. Each movie has different characters, a different plot, and a different setting, yet the goal for each conclusion is the same. The happy ever after ending for every movie, is that the main character loved well at least once in their life in spite of circumstances. You have probably noticed that people on their deathbed, do or say something loving, often out of character, before they go. This is because they are closer to their spirit and may finally realize that to love well was their goal. Imagine if you lived with that consciousness while you were healthy and had time. Everything else physical comes to an end when you die, but people can take your love with them long after you die.

3. You are perfect, were perfect, and always will be perfect.

To the degree that you believe this, is how much physical success you will have. The people who believe in themselves and their ability are the ones who have lasting success in their lives. Belief creates reality. Some people have success for fleeting periods of time, but it doesn't last if their belief in themselves is dependent on what they do or what others think of them.

Belief in yourself is not like what you consider ego or arrogance. To truly believe in this perfection, you must also believe in the inherent perfection of all people and things. Remember how all things were created. Therefore you do not believe you are better than anyone, even though you may act better and have more success because you know the truth about yourself. You never have to judge or be right because you know that you cannot make anyone believe in themselves, though you can show them what it looks like. Your belief in the constant perfection of creation allows you to know that you are successful always because you cannot be anything else. Then what you choose to create will be a success and you know you can create anything.

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Are you lucky? Really, do you feel like you’re a lucky person? Not lucky in the sense that you have a good, or even a great, life, but lucky in the sense that things just seem to fall into your lap?

Whether you are lucky or not, you probably think that luck is just random, that people stumble into good things by accident. You may have heard that luck is “preparation meeting opportunity,” but how then do you explain a mere acquaintance calling you with free tickets to a show you’ve been wanting to see, but couldn’t afford?

What if luck isn’t random after all? What if there is actually a structure underlying luck? Ten years of research by Professor Richard Wiseman of the University of Hertforshire, England suggests exactly this. His research shows that luck is largely composed of four capacities:

1) Creating and noticing chance opportunities. You have to be out in the world, and you have to be relaxed enough to actually notice them.

2) Making lucky decisions by paying attention to your intuition. There is much more happening around us than we can ever grasp in our conscious minds. But beneath our conscious awareness, we are picking up all sorts of cues and clues to what is happening, which we call intuition.

3) Creating self-fulfilling prophecies by having positive expectations. When you expect things to go well, you will unconsciously pick up the cues that match what you expect – you’ll see it when you believe it.

4) Adopting a resilient attitude that transforms bad luck into good. Lemons can be made into lemonade. You can learn from the worst disaster. If you’re always looking for the silver lining in the dark cloud, which is often a life lesson to apply going forward, your luck will improve continuously.

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How to care for Lucky Bamboo by Americanigiftclub.com

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Make Lucky Bamboo Arrangements by Americangiftclub.com

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Quick Tips: Lucky Bamboo Care

As millions of “lucky” consumers around the world have discovered, Lucky Bamboo makes the perfect house or office plant, needing little care but an inch of water and little direct sunlight to keep it happy and thriving…

What is Lucky Bamboo?

Known for centuries as Lucky Bamboo, the plant is not a bamboo at all (botanical name: Dracaena) but a resilient member of the lily family that grows in the dark, tropical rainforests of Southeast Asia and Africa.

How Much Care Does Lucky Bamboo Need?

Keep water fresh by changing it every week, and always keep water levels at approximately an inch from the base of the canes. Lucky Bamboo prefers plenty of indirect sunlight and room temperatures at 65-70°. Although opinions differ on feeding, your Lucky Bamboo is a living organism, so it makes sense to occasionally add a mild solution to the water such as African Violet fertilizer. Since growth can be controlled by feeding, small amounts of fertilizer will keep the plant at a manageable size.

Why Are the Leaves Turning Yellow?

Two of the most common factors are 1.) too much direct sunlight; and 2.) too salty or heavily-fluoridated tap water. To give your new Lucky Bamboo a thriving start be sure to keep it away from direct sunlight, and water only with filtered or natural spring water.

Why Is It Called “Lucky” Bamboo?

Along with its ease of growth, Lucky Bamboo has long been associated with the Eastern practice of Feng Shui - or the bringing of natural elements of water, fire, earth, wood and metal into balance within the environment. Lucky Bamboo is believed to be an ideal example of the thriving wood and water element, with the addition of a red ribbon sometimes tied around the stalks - which is believed to “fire” the positive flow of energy or chi in the room. The number of stalks also has meaning : three stalks for happiness; five stalks for wealth; six stalks for health. Four stalks, however, are always avoided - since the word “four” in Chinese sounds too similar to the Chinese word for “death”!

Can I Take Cuttings from Lucky Bamboo?

Yes. New stalks can be propagated from the original plant by using a sharp knife to cut through a stalk - just below the joint. Place the cutting in fresh, clean water. A fine mist spray to stalks is sometimes suggested to stimulate new bud growth.

How Do I Repot Bamboo?

Like any other houseplant, Lucky Bamboo can be transferred to a vase or pot 2 inches larger than the original, or planted permanently into a loose sand or soil mixture that provides lots of bottom drainage. To avoid root rot, be careful to let the top of the soil dry out between waterings.

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Did you know that there are gifts that will multiply your happiness
when you give them away? Here are seven of those gifts. Giving these
gifts will allow you to share with others your most unique treasure:
your authentic self. Each gift will return to you many times.

As you read about each of these gifts, think about ways that you
could share that gift with someone today.

1. Share appreciation

Tell someone how much you appreciate the faith they've shown in you.
Thank them sincerely for being part of your life. Tell them how much
they are needed.

Feeling appreciated is one of the most important needs that people
have. When you share with someone your appreciation and gratitude,
they will not forget you. Appreciation will return to you many times.

2. Share time

Balance your time expenditures so you can spend time with the people
that you love. Support local organizations by sharing your special
talents. Volunteer time for projects that benefit others in your
community, country, and world.

When we slow down and observe our thoughts closely, we will sometimes
uncover gifts and talents we didn't know we had. Sharing time and
talents can result in discoveries that bring happiness beyond measure.

3. Share knowledge and ideas

Tell someone about a great book that you read so they can benefit
from it too. Teach a new concept or idea that you've learned.

One of the best ways to strengthen new concepts in your mind is to
share them with others. The more often you share what you've learned,
the stronger that information will become in your memory. Sharing
knowledge also provides solutions to problems. The more knowledge we
share, the more knowledge we receive in return.

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Sometimes, when you are committing the relationship with your partner, it is advisable for both of you to stay together and hold your secrets between two of you. As such, these will make both of you gaining respect, trust and understandings. I guess it is simply straight forward and easy to comprehend. Don't you want to have a better relationship? You have to believe in yourself and your partner's words and do take note that such words can not be revealed to anyone else as they may give any misunderstanding or misconception that mislead both of you to wonder why.

A better advice will be simply whichever conversations that you have with your partner, just keep it to yourself. That is because if they are to share with other friends, the other friends may get the same answers and commitments as both of you. Your partner may get extremely surprised that her friends have known something from you that both of you actually keep the words to yourself. That is provided when both of you are committed in the love relationship, that some stuffs are not supposed to be revealed to others, especially your partner's friends or your friends as well.

Let's take for an instance, the social networking sites, like face book and Friendster, They are most well-known and popular networking friendship sites that allow everyone of us to know one another through the sites. However, if you and your partner happen to be in the networking sites and want to continue sharing your intimate secrets, therefore, what you can do is simply just sending the private messages that are available inside the applications, therefore other visitors who view the web profiles and web pages may not know what you are actually conversing with your love partner.

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The following steppingstones will show how to help love grow. They include exercises to strengthen our love muscles, and turn our lives around.

We are meant to live a life of love.  However, no matter how successful some are in other aspects of their lives, they don’t feel it’s possible to have the same success in love. They tell themselves to “be realistic.” Being realistic about relationships” is considered natural as we “grow up” and give up the fantasies, foolishness and dreams of childhood. But being in love is the most mature and realistic thing you can do. It energizes your life, fills you with positivity, creates generosity and makes every moment beautiful. The body heals the heart is happy. The real question is, how can we learn to help love grow in all aspects of our lives? What gets in the way?

The following steppingstones will show how to help love grow, whatever our situation. They include exercises to strengthen our love muscles, and turn our lives around.

The One Right Besides You

Most of the time we are either searching for the right person or wanting to change the one we are with. We do not take a precious moment to stop and truly see the one who is right in front of our eyes. And,  beyond that, though we may not be aware of it, we do many things to push that person away.

Look at a person who is close to you right now – anyone it happens to be. Notice what you are demanding of them in order to be happy together. Then notice the subtle ways in which you push them away.

For a moment, stop it. Spend time just being together. Allow things to go whatever way they do. Let all of it be fine just as it is. 

Tomorrow, do the same thing with someone else.  The more we can be “right” and happy with each person we meet, the fuller and more joyous our lives will be.

Playing At The Game of  Love

So many complain that they are not loved. The reason for this can be quite

simple. They are so busy playing roles and games that the partner never gets to know who they really are. They never know either.

Notice what roles (or games) you play in relationships, and what roles you

demand others play.. See if you are in love with the person you are with, or with the role he/she is playing right now.

Turn this around for a little while. Stop playing roles completely. Love is not a game we play. Love is knowing and accepting yourself and the other exactly as they are. Who we are is always loveable and beautiful. It’s the roles that get in the way.

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With every goal you have in life, people will always be a critical part of it. How fast you reach your goals depends on how well you deal with people and the level of influence you have on them. In order to really influence people you must become a person who is likable. How do you become likable? You must have a sincere interest in other people. Every person on this earth wants to feel important, so you need to treat everyone with the up most importance, because they deserve it. Remember no one is better than you and you are not better than anyone, we are all human beings who deserve the same amount of respect.

Becoming Likable:

Setting the Stage

Your goal in meeting people should be to consciously be the first to initiate and set the stage for conversation. Most people are hesitant to be the first, don’t be like most people step out of your comfort zone. I know that if you are a shy person that this can be one of the hardest things for you to do, but the more you do it, the more you condition your self for it to become second nature. As a small kid I used to be really shy but I noticed that the kids that where outgoing tended to be the happier kids so I began to step out of my comfort zone and now I feel I can walk up to almost anyone. This is going to take time; things don’t happen over night but don’t let this discourage you. Many people feel that for you to become proficient in something takes around five years. Don’t waste anytime, start today and each day after that will get easier. Each different experience will later serve as a reference to remind you, that you can approach almost anyone. By being the first to initiate conversation you also automatically have a certain degree of control, you are able to draw people into your own rhythms. Have you ever noticed how persuasive people are able to seduce you to their ways, dictating your body language and basically synchronizing it to theirs? This is because people naturally imitate other people as a way of communicating with the other person. So if you are the first you get to decide what angle to approach. So if the person you are approaching appears sad, approach them with a big confident smile. Odds are they will slowly begin to smile; you will automatically change their mood. Now you will have a better chance of having a better conversation.

In setting the stage you will need to train your self to pick up any subtle signals that the person you are approaching is giving off. With time you will be able to sum up a person in a blink of an eye and from what your subconscious catches use it help you set the stage. This will require you to have an open mind and immerse your self in as many different worlds/cultures as possible. That’s why I never limit my self to one particular set of friends. I have friends from all sorts of backgrounds. I have friends who are skaters, basketball players, artists, musicians, writers, etc. By having so many friends with diverse interests I quickly learn about their worlds. By knowing what kind of stage to set up you will know how to get the other person to think very highly of you. For example by being observant you will catch the subtleties in the way a person appears to be (The way he is dressed, body language, tone of voice, language, etc.) which will help you to imagine placing your self in there shoes. By really imagining what being that person is like it will give you a good idea of how he/she is feeling. This in turn helps you get a better idea of what appproach to use when trying to communicate effectively with them. When I am able to pick up persons subtleties I will know what topics, questions, and general things that appeal to them which gives me information to work with in the process of winning that person as a friend. Like if know this person is really passionate about cars, I will ask a question with the minimum knowledge I have about something that he knows or thinks he knows a lot about.

Now you set the stage for Mike who will love to tell me exactly why the Mitsubishi EVO is better. When someone is knowledgeable about something it’s in their nature to tell you because it is one more opportunity for them to show how great or smart they are. You have to cater to their ego and never test or contradict their ideas, because their ego will not accept someone who is supposed to know less tell them they are possibly wrong. If I would have told him that I heard that the Subaru WRX is better, we would have just gotten in an argument that he would not have backed out of. But I didn’t and now they will love me for it, because I was taking interest into what he enjoys.

Body Language

Whenever you approach someone for the very first time your body language will do most of the talking and the other person will immediately have a first impression of you. So you must always be aware that whatever you say your body is also in agreement. If you say one thing and your body says the opposite you will come out as someone fake. We have all seen the girl that walks up to another girl and says “I’m so happy to see you…how you been?....you look so good…” but their body language is saying “what are you doing here….I’m not really listening to what your saying” this is easily seen and can be one of the rudest things you can do in trying to make new friends. Always approach someone with open gestures and a smile. If you approach someone with crossed arms, this will automatically make the other person defensive and question your motives. Approach them with open arms and a gentle smile, smiling is infectious if the other person has a stern look on their face the moment youapproach them with a smile you will gradually notice that they will smile too. This usually sets it up for a good conversation because both people are in good moods. Try this - if you’re in a neutral mood right now, put a big smile on your face for no reason if you pay attention you can feel your body changing and your mood immediately start to change. People who are in good moods will place a lot more importance to what you have to say.

Questions and Listening

Your next goal is to sincerely try to find out as much as you can about the person. Ask quality questions; find out what is important to the person, goals, beliefs, interests, etc. The key is to be sincere so the person feels comfortable and is more likely to open up. Try to have a calm demeanor refrain from being overly eager as this might scare the person. You must be able to match the mood of the person. If the person is excited to tell you a story you must become excited as well. If the person is telling you a sad story you must show sincere empathy. Be open minded and really listen to the person.

Listening: Try to listen at least twice as much as you talk. Listening requires more than just pretending to listen or simply hearing a person talk. Listening and hearing are two completely different things and the person can tell if you’re really listening to them, or simply hearing them speak. Being a good listener is a skill, you must become an active listener. Remember this is all about the other person, who cares if you don’t get to talk about your self. In the end the other person will love you for it. They will tell their friends

“Man I really enjoyed talking to that person”….why is that? Was he a very interesting person? “You know what…I really don’t know why…I really don’t know much about him”

This shouldn’t bother you because in the end you greatly benefited from the situation as well. If you’re an effective listener you will gain a better understanding of that person’s thoughts, perspectives, feelings and actions. You have to remember that most people would rather talk than listen, but most of the time this person is not very influential. Take this as an opportunity to become more persuasive and influential.

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What, if any, are the differences between love and dating? What is love? What is dating? Undoubtedly, many people will insist there is no difference between love and dating, and most certainly, many of you out there are dating and love the person you date. Nonetheless, not everyone who dates actually loves the person they are currently with, just as you don’t date everyone you love. Love; love is a huge subject, much has been said on the topic of love, and without a doubt much more has yet to be said.

By definition, dating is going out and seeing someone socially. In the modern world we live in, many people think nothing of dating several people at once, perhaps this is just part of a selfish compulsion to have as much as one can for oneself; or it may be a way of testing the situation. After all, we can buy goods and take them back if we don’t like them and test-drive a car, why can’t we test relationships. Going out with several people is also a way to try to avoid getting hurt, most of us have been hurt in the past and don’t ever want to go through such an awful experience ever again. So we close ourselves off, refuse to allow ourselves to develop true feelings or “love”, instead we go out with multiple partners, date casually and break things off whenever we feel they are getting too serious or love-like.

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